inane chatter II, honestly i am just a empty headed bimbo, without the good looks (lol)

Saturday! I wasn't looking forward for this day, because i got so many things to do, which i did. I just want to slack, dammit! Woke up at a unearthly hour at 8, (for a weekend at least, become a habit already... so sad.) did household chores for a few agonizing hours while the rest of my family lolled in their beds. Clean and scrub my gardening area and pots while expressing apologies to my long suffering plants. Then Cook! Wow, have not cook for a long time other than making some odd sandwiches. (But that doesn't count.) I opened my refrigerator and found half of ingredients missing. Where are all my eggs?! But i made do and bit back screams of anguish. Half way through my dad called me to gloat that I am now the ONE doing the household chores while he is traipsing the Malaysian countrysides photographing birds. I contemplated the wisdom of flinging plates around the kitchen but decided it was too much mess. Thank goodness i don't need to cook for my siblings because they won't wake up till mid afternoon at least these lazy buggers.

Finally took a leisurely brunch while reading the newspapers and lowering what is left of my IQ by watching the latest episode of Gossip girls. The show sucks. But it made for compulsive watching because i want to watch how low the plot can sink. I am pretty sure the writers strike had been over for a few months. I want HOUSE md s4!! The craggy face, tortured visage, lanky build and acerbic wit, not to mention the intense eyes... i am salivating am i?

I am sure there is alot of photoshopping done here but... you get the picture. Looks doesn't count. haha!

Not like me to moon so much but well.. I have to act like a gal sometimes!

I rushed off excitedly to school. I like the psychology teacher because he is quite a kind sweet man. He will be quite a teacher if he talks faster and insert more interesting subjects to the lecture. So I was fighting to keep awake as i listen to him talk. Around me, everyone looked black face and stern. I tried to talk to a few people but they look very guarded. So i ended up being very sian in the class. Seriously seriously misses my last semester friends. Hiaz... Good thing is that I met my Law teacher in school and was so happy to see his face. He even shook my hand. hahah... Much as i like him, i hope i don't get to see him next semester.

I ran off (quite literally) to the library and borrowed 6 books including a very interesting one on Sigmund Freud's cases. Woohoo! I also went to look at Bras Plaza for art classes but only saw a pathetic one which only offer design classes. I am interested, but Lucy and i need fine arts classes. Why is it so difficult to find one?

20% Kinokuniya members discount! I beelined to Kinokuniya after the library and got 1 magazine and 2 comic books. I look like i am shifting homes/or libraries at that point. I noticed that there aren't good new books in the bookstores lately. What's up with that?

Finally i carried the books to Soup Spoon to grab dinner. I love love love their soup. Surprisingly there was alot of empty seats despite Bugis being super crowded. So i read and eat at the same time. I know it's odd to eat alone, especially in a restaurant, but when you are occupied with a book, people fade away.

After alighting at Newton mrt, i decided (foolishly) to walk home with my load of 9 books. It took me 1 hour and 45 minutes and at one point i was really tempted to throw my books onto the road and let the cars run over them. I must have looked really limp and grouchy because a dog i passed by actually eyed me quite moanfully. A dog commiserating with me? Man... I reach a new low. Thank goodness i only met jogging caucasions (one with lots of holes in his shirt. lol) and cycling foreign workers as my body's reserve of water is depleted.

But i love walking. (read: only in the evening/night) I love the alternating sweet and woody smell of trees and flowers and of imminent rain; wind ruffling my hair and clothes; random thoughts fleeting through my mind. These are really sweet and simple pleasures i adore. And while i cursed my books and my throbbing feet, i think when time allows, i will do it again today, and tomorrow and the next.

End of long essay... now sleep for awhile before i start on another long day...zzz...

more inane chatter

It is another rainy day, another day of humdrum. So i thought as i went to work in the morning. And was greeted by Jasper's patented nutty honey mustard sandwich. Yummy! Despite his protests, I suspect it's his wife who made it. Taste too good to be made by this clownish and macho bugger. Everyone in the office had half a slice while he made a full sandwich for himself. Okkkk...
I also talked at length with a primary school classmate whom i found in facebook. 16 years! The last time i saw him was 16 years ago and we can talk so naturally on msn now. And about controversial topics like homosexuality (no we aren't) and "Tiger" shows in Bangkok somemore. Hahah! It was funny. I had to cover up quickly when my bosses walk pass. I am really not a model employee today.
The highlight of the day is when my bosses tell me that they have settled on someone they can replace me with!! WOOHOO! She will be coming next Monday and i only need to coach her for a week before i can gooo!! WOOHOO! Yes, despite my inner jubilations i felt tugs of sadness. I had been working in Rhema for more than a year and i love the people here. Definitely including my bosses. Everyone there are fair, kind, understanding and very funny people. And we share this unlikely chemistry with each other. Not chemistry actually, i reckon it is the "bully Sijin" spirit that they really have. hhaha... I can be totally myself there. As in the irrelevant and madcap person that i restrain myself from being because they are highly tolerant to my nonsense. haha! Maybe the people there are more nonsensical than me that's why. Now that i wrote this i am wondering why i am even leaving... No... i got too much things to do, most of all my family responsibilities. Oh man... i think i will really miss them...
I love taking the bus home, especially after a rain, especially when i am beside the window. It always put me in an introspective mood. And today is no different.
Realized i have been blogging quite alot lately. Which is unusual judging from the frequencies of my past entries. Well... writing is very cathartic. It does evoke alot of feelings and memories as i write but when i finish my last word there is a great sense of release and relief. I love writing and my secondary school teacher, Mr Quek, was instrumental to that. He even told the class that he will bring my journal (we used to write journals and the teachers will mark them.) home so he can read it at his own leisure. Hiaz... i love secondary school. While primary school remain the time i had unaffected unadulterated fun, secondary school was the time i was great in what i love to do. Which was art and literature. On the hindsight of the academic disaster that was junior college, i should have taken what i love instead of the conventional and the practical route. At that moment of time, i didn't dare to step out of the ordinary and now i have to suffer the rest of the way... Oh boy.. i suddenly really intensely miss my secondary school teachers... Mr. Sim, Mr. Teoh, Ms. Kathy Yeo (she is the greatest of all art teachers), Mr Quek, Ms. Chua... You might not realized the effect that your guidance give to your myriad students, but for us, it will stay with us for the rest of our lives...
I have always been horrendous at following up with people, with friends. I hope this holiday i can meet up with my old and new friends as well as my past teachers.

Busy weekend

Weekend

Verbal Diarrhoea- so dun read if you want to read something of substance.

What a busy busy weekend. I went to Yi Fang's home to play with her baby, and took some very blurred pictures because Si yan wants to try taking pictures. Haha! Good effort though. Managed to go Haji Lane to spend alot of money on clothes and shoes. Went to the Kuan Yin temple to pray because my eye had been consistently twitching these days, might be the lack of quality sleep but i never know. Met Caili awhile to look at some projects she had done. Rushed down to Bishan Herb garden to learn more about herb gardening. Finally having dinner with my parents after so long (months!) and buying 2 books so that i got something interesting to read. Sadly, i didn't manage to go to the gym again this weekend. Will chiong again during the weekday. After all, my membership only applies for weekdays and going in the weekend means i have to pay $5 for day pass. Seriously not worth it.

The best part of the weekend came yesterday as i am waiting for my father at the bus stop alone. It was coming dusk and the air was filled the scent of impending rain. It was quite cool and gentle breezes was brushing lightly against my skin. I was bored and decided to plug in my earphones to listen to John Mayer. I have only got John Mayer on my phone because i was lazy to download more music ever since i bought the phone. The music from W980 is sublime... Now i understand why some people buy the best and the most expensive sound systems. Gosh, I really love acoustic and i love John Mayer's voice. His voice is so husky and intoxicating. Especially when he sings "Falling" and "In your atmosphere." My hair literally stands on its ends.

As i was waiting, i saw the weirdest thing. A 40ish woman brisk walked pass me wearing black and white tailored work jacket on top and red sport SHORTS and SHOES below. She was also carrying stacks of documents on her hands and an umbrella hanging from her arm. The contrast is just jarring... I just look incredulously at her back as she walked quickly away. I guess i had that usual expression on my face la, you know lah friends, the mouth ajar and THAT frown. And i even placed a finger on my chin like "what the hell?" Then i turned around and saw someone in a car just infront of me laughing hilariously at ME. Bugger. No, is not my father.

Life in focus II

What I'm watching now

Michiko to Hatchin, Kuroshitsuji, Kurozuka, Mouryou no Hako, Gossip Girl. Mostly supernatural animes except for the last which is purely for sniggering purposes. Used to be actually interesting in the first season but deteriorate into something cliche and incoherant in the second.
When can i get my House md season 4?

Watched recently

Thanks to Caroline, Taken (a fantastic Liam Neeson, though the story is quite predictable and heavily sterilised), and Byosoku 5 centimeter (i vomitted blood throughout the show. Dun understand why the male protaganist so wishy washy and passive. He loves her so much, yet never do anything, just type unsent messages. Too stylised for my taste, gorgeous animation though.)

Reading now
Nothing interesting for the first time. I am waiting for Kinokuniya to get back to me on Phil Rickman's latest book. (which is released already but not here in Singapore... HIAZ...) I hate to say this Yun Jin but though Borders do have more books the customer service sux big time. The only time i can call in the system is down and the sales assistant never attempted to help look for my book. Kino will never let the customers down this way. We do have system slowdowns and failures but we always try our best.) Anyway, for the uninitiated, it is a fantastic UK series on a mystery solving pastor. I have reread each of his books at least twice. I need to visit the libraries pronto.

Games playing
Fable 2 (which is getting boring now); The Sims 2; The Lost Crown-Ghost hunting adventure (quite ok, the Saxon premises is quite intriguing but characters are uninspired and game isn't scary)

Anticipating
My tomato to ripen; Christmas; stopping work; online purchases to come; learning Japanese, Art and violin; going Malaysia and Bangkok in December; going to the gym (no really, it makes me happy after the self-induced torture.); taking Psychology; bookstores and libraries marathon; painting and drawing again

Planning
Going Malaysia and Bkk; to clean up home and room; getting fit; exploring Chinatown, Little India and Haji Lane & going to farms and MacRitchie Reservoir (who can i drag there? Rub hands.. heheh...)

Hating
Recent never ending breakouts; working; being broke.

Ending remarks
Really really missing Japan. Also been in a blue flunk lately. Haiz...

Where did my Fri and Sat go?

I resolve to work really hard next week. Have been the most lousiest employee for some time and the bosses have been really really nice about it. Haiz, i will seriously miss the people there if not the soul draining monotonous work.
It is the real start of my "holiday". Not say "holiday" now because i just learnt that i can take psychology this semester. That's great, because while i can lighten the load for my next semester, the workings of the human mind also intrigue me. Lucy, Yu han and i are always contemplating the utter unpredictability and intricacies of our psyche. We are the philosopher bunch and can talk about anything under the sun and beyond it in fact. Even cancelling the Halloween party so that we can talk. Take me for example, i am fantastically idiosyncratic. I tend to procrastinate more when i am stressed. The more work i need to do, the more i will divert my attention to less important things. Or that while i am very much an open book i will sometimes act in contradiction to my emotions so that i can hide behind the facade of impassiveness and detachness. This latter characteristic is something that we all 3 agree that we will do to protect ourselves from disappointment and uncertainty.

Chit chat hmm... I just realised that i am happier and comfortable with people who i can talk things with. People who actually have opinions, experience and perception about human issues. That is why i get along with people older than me better, Lucy and Yu han not including. I used to be very serious, focused and pensive when i was in secondary school, early part of JC and early part of monash college (i 'm sure Ilica and gang can attest) but as i grow older and know people who are younger, much younger, i guess i started to become more frivolous and immature. I do love that part of me, where i can banter, laugh freely, be spontaneous and nutty. (It came with a cost, because as i reflect now, i grow less driven and focused academically when i become like that. Guess that i am just someone who cannot multi task. Is either one way or the other.) But i still prefer talking, because this is when my real self comes in. When i marvel and deliberate at the things going around me, to discuss about things but to try not to judge because we are human and above all, fallable. I took feature writing last sem because of this and was devastated as the lecturer in Singapore is not charismatic and experienced enough to make the students discuss about human interest stories. Hiaz... well, i hope psychology is different. Hope that it will really give me something to think about.

Since when did this post become so serious and self indulgent? Wanted to write about the Caroline's slumber party and it evolved to this. Lol.. Ah well, i write about it tomorrow and all. It got some very unflattering pictures of me but i am going to post it up or Caiyun and gang will start snoring.

Post exam

I wake up after a measly 6 hours sleep with a racking cough. Thanks to you Adrian, i foresee i have to spend a big part of my holiday coughing my lungs out. Next time we really should enter your office with face masks and suits so we dun get infected by your miscellaneous illnesses. zzz.

Yesterday was my last day of exams and haiz, HIAZZ... I can only cross my fingers (and toes) and wish for the best. The paper wasn't tough, but all the things that i studied just happen to leak out of my brains before the exam. Ok, i am not going to think about it, pondering about things done only makes me crazy.

Was bombarded by calls and msgs by my parents after the exam. Then Caroline for tonight's slumber party. (I AM FINE WITH ANYTHING!! LOL!) It will be really good to see the girls again after so long... I have sorely neglected you guys. Dun worry, this holiday you will see so much of me that you might puke. (not surprising with the breakout i am having.)

I went to work after the horrible exam very sadly. Thinking of how slowly time will move there. I was really exhausted and didn't have the mood to think anymore. It is incredible how Nicole and Janice can work full time and study simultanously. I guess for me...one part is that i am really bored with the job scope and that i'm so tired of working. so so so tired... Have been working almost non stop since i was 19. I just want to do my own stuff for awhile. But I love the people there. We are absolutely the most spontaneous and wackiest ppl there. And i never laugh so much anywhere else before. These people are nuts.

After work, with really small squinty eyes since my eyes are really tired i finally get to see a friend that i have not seen for MONTHS. Yi fang, will make up to you i promise. :) She brought Yan yan along and i am absolutely charmed. She is so adorable and sweet! The nicest thing about her is that she is so happy and bubbly, bouncing here and there, letting me carry her, hold her hands. Another great thing is that Yi fang gave me a belated birthday present (s) and i am really touched by the effort she took to choose and buy it for me. I love them girl. Thank you. ^_^

Managed to coerce them to Borders ahahah! Feel somewhat guilty because Yi Fang doesn't read, but she happily read to Yan Yan while i did a quick run around the place and was really sian to see no interesting books to buy. After buying two miserable magazines so that i got something to read at least, we went up Wheelocks Place to talk about very interesting things. LOL...

Ok, my eyes are shutting again, wonder if i got time to sleep before i get ready for work. This is a very disjointed effort of writing, will refine it again if i got the time... now...zzzz.....